Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
