p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
