Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
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