Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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