bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Randomize
