google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
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