It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
