Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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