So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Randomize
