how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
