Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I am midnight drunk by noon
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
