Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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