All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
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