Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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