I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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