those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Randomize
