Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
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