Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Randomize
