I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
