I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
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