so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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