I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
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Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
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We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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