Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
