I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
