Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
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