If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
