We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Little spoons don't ask big questions
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
