Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize