Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
