Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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