Can i not drive my cunt home
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
