I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
