Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
lol hangovers are for mortals.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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