porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Randomize
