so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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