oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
