yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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