This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize