They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
