Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked