If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
