I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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