How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
