Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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