She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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