The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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