My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
