U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
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I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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