I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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