There is no way he is gay with that hair.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
