Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
