If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize