shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize