My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
P.S. I can't hear my feet
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
